I’ve always made a point to celebrate my birthday. In fact, as I was discussing this with some colleagues that have founded their own company, they are considering instituting some kind of mandatory day off for your birthday at their outfit. That would be the kind of benefit that would definitely get me interested in a company. 🙂
As it turns out though, my mom spoiled me rotten. She made our birthdays out to be such huge awesome events that nobody could ever make me feel quite that special in my future life. We didn’t have much money at all when I was growing up, so I think that’s why I (and my sisters too on their birthdays) got even more attention. Big elaborate plans were made, special themed cakes were prepared, my favorite food was always present, I was always consulted regarding the party planning, and somehow I always seemed to get some amazing gift I wanted that my parents probably should not have been spending their money on.
So then I grew up. As the years went on my poor husband, without any real knowledge of the history of my birthdays at home, ended up gettting this pressure put upon him. I didn’t realize I was doing it and this year it all kind of came to a disturbing and unpleasant head. It was an oddly rough year. I think it had to do with the fact that I’m getting old and because it was a Tuesday, but for some reason, I just could not be satisfied with anything yesterday. My poor husband tried to make me happy all day and nothing seemed or felt right. I was of course very verbal about this and made his life pretty rough all day long.
Luckily, my husband is patient and kind. After I finally stopped being such a brat (mind you almost the entire day went this way-except for VERY brief moments), we sat and we talked about what my major malfunction was and I now know, more than ever, that communication is vital to good marriages. You have to push through the ickiness and the bad behavior. You have to be patient and kind (like my awesome husband) and if you can manage this, you’ll get to the core issues of what is bothering you so much faster.
In the end, the birthday turned out wonderful. I got an awesome gift from my awesome husband and we saw one of the best movies ever at the $1 theater. I think the best gift of all though, a gift you can’t go out and buy, was how my husband spent the end of the day with me, talking, caring, listening, and helping. He forgave that bad behavior and helped me understand where it came from. I’m a lucky, lucky girl.
I think you are being too kind in your description of my behavior. I lost my temper more than a few times during the day and that didn’t help.
However, I have to agree with your conclusions. Lack of understanding of “requirements” were the root cause here (sorry, I’m at work at the moment 🙂